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It’s not you, it’s me

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What motivates you

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Dana Weston is a Novant Health employee who has taken our mission to help our communities get better and stay healthy to heart…and extended it to her own family. When Dana learned that her mom, Del, had been diagnosed with dangerously high glucose levels (indicating a potential diabetes diagnosis), she leapt into action, moving her mom from St. Louis  to Charlotte, N.C. so that they could tackle this condition together during a 30-day “boot camp” designed by Dana. And now she’s sharing their journey with all of us. Using the insights that she has gained as a Novant Health employee, along with the input and advice of our physicians, wellness coaches and diabetes navigators, Dana is helping her mom reclaim her health and her life.

It’s not you, it’s me

Nov 21

Written by:
11/21/2013  RssIcon

We are in the final week of our journey together. My mom has come such a long way but, at times, it is difficult for her to say with certainty that she will never go back. It’s hard for any of us to walk away from habits, choices, and dependencies that we have held on to for so long. So today, I asked my mom to write a break-up letter to her old way of life, formally walking away from the past and entering her future with confidence.

Below is an excerpt from her honest, emotional, and beautifully written letter.

Dear Self,

I never thought I’d be faced with writing this letter. You and I have been one for many years. However, this past month without you has opened my eyes to how badly you have treated me.  It’s now clearly apparent that you haven’t had my best interests in mind for a number of years.  If I remain with you, my health and my quality of life will be compromised.  Yes, even my very life will be in peril.

This month I’ve taken the first step toward a life without you.  With the support of my family and others, I am now armed with the knowledge I need to live and enjoy a healthier lifestyle. Exercise has taken me to a level that you had me believe that I could never in a hundred years accomplish.  Do you know that I cycled 60 straight minutes on the stationary bike just 18 days after our separation?  And you always told me that I couldn’t exercise due to my bad back and arthritic knees. You have consistently encouraged me to quit…and sweetheart, my mama didn’t raise no quitter.

Please know that I forgive you for your lack of knowledge and denial of my health issues. It was easy since the symptoms can be so readily explained and rationalized.  However, I have been given an opportunity to change my life. You have not supported me to bring the change my body craves, so I cannot stay with you any longer. You will not be the end of me. This is the new path God has given me and He did not bring me this far to leave me. 

I know this won’t be easy, but we can no longer hang out. We are not on the same page and I am moving on. Yes, I have already found someone else. Me. And I am making a commitment to improving the years I have left. I know you’ll want to hold on to me, but you’ll have to wave goodbye to my slimmer backside…because I’m already walking away.

This is our final correspondence.

Del

Today’s Mantra: You are too smart to be the only thing standing in your way.

A special thank-you to Kim Kyle-Trejos in the Novant Health Diabetes Center for sharing the idea for this exercise that she uses with many of her patients.

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Location: Blogs Parent Separator Diabetes Blog

5 comment(s) so far...


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Re: It’s not you, it’s me

Your letter brought me to tears. I hope you both know that your story has been an inspiration for many who may never meet you. Everyone is rooting for you as you prepare to go home. Thank you for taking us on this journey with you

By Kati on   11/21/2013
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Re: It’s not you, it’s me

Way to go! What a bold stance you're taking, and we are all so proud of you! Keep it up!

By Maria on   11/22/2013
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Re: It’s not you, it’s me

60 minutes on the bike!? How fantastic! This letter seems like such a great exercise, and I see your sincerity in every word. You're in the home stretch on this boot camp journey, but I know this will be just the beginning for you. Congratulations!

By Andrea Bartoszewicz on   11/22/2013
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Re: It’s not you, it’s me

"Yes, I have already found someone else. Me." Says Del Weston. 2 words, LOVE IT!

By Georgia on   11/22/2013
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Re: It’s not you, it’s me

Extremely powerful letter with a lot of heart put into it! Amazing progress only a few short weeks and I'm sure this is only the beginning from the words from your letter. Congrats Del!

By Zac Ankrom on   12/11/2013

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Re: It’s not you, it’s me
Extremely powerful letter with a lot of heart put into it! Amazing progress only a few short weeks and I'm sure this is only the beginning from the words from your letter. Congrats Del!

Re: Time to fly
Congratulations!! You are armed with information and resources and also have a success story worth sharing! What an inspiration! Keep flying high!

Re: New pants
Keep up the good work! And remember, salad is the main meal. Don't let the food industry continue to fool you ie: The beef council, The dairy industry into thinking that you need to eat meat and dairy, which is the worst food you can eat, to stay healthy and get the 'protien' you need. Have you ever seen a skinny, weak hippopotamus or gorilla? They are vegatarians! The calcium in milk is mostly blocked by the fat so your body can't absorb it. Animal protien is a huge causative factor in arthritis. Anyway,good job and stay the course. Btw; Be careful about drugs as they are all toxic to some degree and doctors don't know what they should about them. Use food as a drug,preventative agent.

Re: The doctor is in
Dana and Del - Congratulations to you both! What an accomplishment this boot camp has been, and it is incredible how much you've learned! Knowledge here is power, and it must be such a great feeling to know that you can do this! Keep it up, you are both so inspiring!

Re: A healthy kidnapping
Thank you so much for sharing. My husband found out he was diabetic last year when he ended up in ICU. His blood sugar was 1322. How he survived that I do not know. But he did and the last year has been an uphill battle all the way. I have gotten discouraged with his lack of concern (after the initial shock wore off). But you have given me hope and have lit a fire under me once again to try my best to encourage him once again that he can do this. Thank you so much.

Re: What motivates you
Thanks, I didn't cry until I read this one.... lol KEEP IT UP!

Re: It’s not you, it’s me
"Yes, I have already found someone else. Me." Says Del Weston. 2 words, LOVE IT!

Re: It’s not you, it’s me
60 minutes on the bike!? How fantastic! This letter seems like such a great exercise, and I see your sincerity in every word. You're in the home stretch on this boot camp journey, but I know this will be just the beginning for you. Congratulations!

Re: New pants
Ok so I am SOOOOO late {3 weeks to be exact} coming into this, however let me first say how surpised I am NOT at you two phenomenal women! Del and Dana, you both hold such a significant place in my heart and I must say that I am behind you both 110%!!! Heck, I am even joining you!
Del: 14.8 pounds in 3 weeks?!?! YOU GO GIRL!!! That is amazing! I am so proud of you.
Dana: Did you really have to add in the bit about her curlers? lol And, YES they made a huge difference, whoop whoop! New pants are great, but a healthier you is even better! I do believe that I have found my new favorite read. Keep the updates coming!
Love it and love you both dearly!
Georgia :-)

Re: It’s not you, it’s me
Way to go! What a bold stance you're taking, and we are all so proud of you! Keep it up!